“My Lovely, Lovely, Lovely horse running through the fields, where are you going with your fetlocks blowing in the wind? I want to shower you with sugar lumps, and ride you over fences. Polish your hooves every single day, and bring you to the horse dentist. My Lovely Lovely, Lovely, Lovely Horse, you’re a pony no more.” 

One of the many jewels of the sporting calendar, The Grand National, takes place tomorrow at Aintree, Liverpool. With forty runners and thirty fences, it would be easier to pick the lottery numbers than accurately predict the race. However, having said that, here are my Top 5 Tips that certainly haven’t been chosen purely due to their cool name, or their colours looking nice.

I Just Know 16/1  Why would I think this horse will win? I Just Know. You can have that line for free, and use it yourself to impress your friends and/or family when he romps home a day before his 10th birthday. 

The Last Samuri 20/1  Anyone who knows anything about history knows that the Samurai were some of history’s greatest warriors. Despite the fact our equine friend seems to have dropped an ‘a’ somewhere along the way, I still hope he can put up a good fight.

Carlingford Lough 50/1 Carlingford Lough is a very picturesque location along the Irish Border. My grandad used to drive across there from my cousins house in Newry to get cheaper petrol, and we would have a lovely ice cream, they were fun times. A victory at 50/1 would guarantee more fun times tomorrow.

Tiger Roll 12/1  Cousin of everyones favourite bread the Tiger Baguette, Tiger Roll is joint favourite for the race. He had a good win at Cheltenham last month and his Da won the 2007 Derby, I’m not quite sure what this means but jockey Davy Russell has a star on his hat and a star on his jersey so hopefully he will be the star of the race.

Delusionofgrandeur 80/1 He’s never fallen in any of his 20 races and having a hope of winning is truly a delusion of grandeur, so maybe there’s a hint here for us. 

For me, I just hope all the horses have a fun time. But if one of my selections makes you a good bit of money, I will expect a 10% cut of the winnings.